Sunday, October 30, 2011

Let's discuss the holidays for a moment or two, shall we?

I came to the conclusion tonight that most holidays have one common goal in mind for us. To make us fat.

This starts with Valentine's Day. Assuming you are involved with someone, you should be showered with chocolate and other sweet type things. (this is a moot point for me, I am not involved lol)

St Patrick's Day and Mardi Gras both bring with them booze. Mardi Gras brings cake too.

Easter is another candy filled holiday (though I have put a limit on this in my house) and a large dinner with leftovers for days

Memorial Day signals the first big cookout of the year. This is also another leftovers for days day.

June is a free month. Sit back, catch your breath, diet furiously.

July. 4th of July! more cookouts and if you have cookouts like what I have seen, there are always multiple desserts.

August, another free month!!! breathe....

September - Labor Day, usually the real last weekend you have for cookouts because now your life is consumed with school, after school sports, homework, etc.

October. I hate Halloween. I truly do. My children not only come home from school with the arms flowing over with candy, treat bags, cookies, etc, but then there is trick or treating. Trick or treating/crap brought home from school this year has resulted in 4 LARGE bowls of candy, not to mention a large pile of treat bags, and quite a few cookies. that does not count the cookies and other crap they brought home. It is not staying in the house, I have already warned them. I will let them munch on it until next weekend and if I can't find someone by then who wants it, it is OUT of this house. They are not allowed many sweets on a normal basis, so this month is always hard.

November. Oh Thanksgiving, all my comfort foods. I love you, I really do. I eat too much this one and only day, but I love you so. and I love you every day until I am sick of the sight and smell of you.

Christmas. This is like a re-run of Thanksgiving, except now there are Christmas cookies, candies, cakes, etc. none of which I think I will be baking this year. Christmas makes you remember why you don't eat turkey the rest of the year, so when you wonder in June, this is the answer. you burn yourself out on it in November and December.

New Year's Eve. I think the true reason we drink so much on this night is not to ring out the old year, and in the new, but to try to remember how much crap we actually ate throughout the year.

Just sayin.

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